WARNING: the foods we cook for Abby are safe for her, but not necessarily for everyone. Please confirm any ingredients are safe for you before using in your diet. Food Allergies can kill and the best policy is complete avoidance. Read this post for more info.

Thursday, March 29, 2012

More Project Elimination

Abby was having an okay day yesterday. Not great, but not bad.. the sleep a thon is past I think.

Since the only area in her health that I can make a difference in is what she eats and her environment, those two area's that I have focused the majority of my energy on.

For years I was the "Allergy Mom!" She was deprived of cute fluffy stuffed animals on her bed, the only curtains were ones that could be yanked down and washed in hot water, all cotton bedding, no books, no girl junk littering her room... but somewhere around age 10-12 when she started feeling bad despite my war on dust mites I declared defeat- and let her start squirreling away tons of girl junk...I was having more issues with my back and cleaning and vacuuming her room daily dropped off my priority list. To my shame I have the ability now to walk past her room without seeing a thing wrong! For her it was freedom at last!

At this point the sheer mass of fluffy items so frivolously piled all over her bed, make it a serious chore to change her bedding weekly, It takes two hands to close her closet door- one to hold back the clearly replicating clothes while the other slams it shut quickly... Everyone groans when we help put her clothes in her dresser- I swear her sock drawer is very similar to a pressure cooker and one day I am going to open it and socks are going to go flying! Literally, there are shoe boxes stacked floor to ceiling in her closet, I don't think even she knows which shoes she owns!

Oh and the clutter... little pretties from Derek's travels around the world(scorpion paperweight?)favorite stuffed critters, little kitty figurines my Mom sent her before she passed away. College books, wrappers from packages that came from Korea, Poland, - admittedly the wrapping is unique, but do we really need to save it? Oh and stacks of DVD's,(We have dvd storage books,but somehow they rarely get put in there)and the jewelry- Abby rarely wears it, but the piles of tangled jems and pretties indicate a jewelry addict lives in there! Surely, you get the point- it has become an almost unimaginable hoard of everything a teen girl could covet! :-)

Here is where I have to admit that it wasn't just my back that has kept me out of sorting her room these past few years.. I grew up in a home where my Mom was a cleaning fanatic...that was bad enough, but my Step Mom used my bedroom for a guest room, so it had to be kept as she wanted my room.. no Duran Duran posters, no frilly pink covers, no teen magazines scattering the floor.. it just never felt like it was "mine" I was SOOOOO jealous of my friends rooms where we literally fished for clothes off the floor, where the ceilings were covered with magazine cutouts and the silly little glow in the dark stars- it seemed so personal, it made the room theirs. So, the condition or lack of organization and clutter in my girls rooms is my way of letting them have their own space, used in a way that makes them feel at "home". For years I too was the cleaning fanatic.. I cleaned base boards at least 1x a week.. my toilets and bathrooms were wiped down daily.. I am not sure exactly when I surrendered but, if you catch me off guard you will find some dust in my house, and heaven save anyone when they open a designated junk drawer..

There has to be a balance... vacuuming once a week is perfectly okay. Leaving a project scattered across the kitchen table for a week isn't hurting a thing.. but now I know why perhaps my family was so particular.. like gremlins girl junk(including mine)seems to multiple without any effort! We have hit mass capacity!

Abby and I went through 2 drawers yesterday. She can sit comfortably in bed and make all the decisions, and I get to ferret through the tangles of fabric and fold, and sort and remove. I see her room in my mind with strategically placed girl clutter, tidy and tightly made bed, and as I sort those clothes and beat and force them into order, I secretly smile to myself that I might be just a little sad to see too much perfection.

Will her closet ever be organized in a way that makes sense to me?(I am color coordinated- if I hang a black item in the wrong color zone it can interfere with my sleep- but my shoes are thrown and piled joyously all over the floor!) no, and it shouldn't make sense to me, but to her.

If I can just dust and vacuum weekly without preparing myself for 4 hours of moving items- I think we have come to a nice compromise!

Today as I drink my coffee I think I might be ready to war with the sock drawer.. I am trying to decide if there will be more unmatched then matched in there.. and if any of the socks still hiding in there may date back to elementary school- and I am smiling.


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